"Christian" blogs

I've been surfing some blogs and websites today and I have to say that some of them saddened me greatly. Some are so filled with hate and outright sin that it shocks me that they can still post about their relationship with the Lord. In one, a woman was angry that someone else asked for a recipe because she'd most probably claim it as her own. So the woman purposely was trying to mislead the other woman - then finally when "forced" to give her recipe, she lied and left out a few key ingredients so this woman couldn't bring it to a gathering that they were both at and claim it as her own. This woman was gleeful that it turned out gross but then was angry because some of the women thought it was her own dish that she brought rather than this "wicked crone". (yes, that's a direct quote).

On another blog, there were some very hateful words against Clay Aiken who came "out" in a magazine that he is, in fact, gay. Yeah - that's no surprise for those of us who have watched him but this woman had never seen him - just his picture. She said basically that she could have told anyone he's gay just by looking at his picture. Hmmm - that's interesting. Now, Clay Aiken small and has finer features than say, Vin Diesel, but there are a lot of straight men with similar features. So she can tell that someone is living a sinful lifestyle by looking on the outward appearance in a photograph? Then she went on to say some very coarse things about him. Now I certainly don't condone homosexuality and have helped to counsel someone out of that lifestyle but calling them names is not going to help. Truth will but truth with grace. Truth with love. Truth like Jesus told the truth.

SIGH. What ever happened to the fruits of the Spirit? Love? Joy?? Peace?? Self-control?? Kindness?? I guess you don't need them when you don't feel like it.

I have a few verses to speak to this issue:

Philipians 2:3 "Let nothing be done through strife or vain glory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves."

James 3:13-18 "13Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace."

And here it comes

I just realized the title of this blog post can apply to two things that are on my mind. The first being the economy and how it's affecting us and also the fall season coming on. :)

The economy - MAN, people are scared, aren't they? It seems that so many are seeing things in a way that they never did - especially in this area. I live in a pretty affluent place and most people drive big cars, live in big houses, have housekeepers and everything they want. Now they're complaining about how they have no money anymore. It's an interesting thing to watch.

We have lost money. Yeah, it's all on paper but even that is enough to make you get a tear in your eye thinking what that money would do if it was actually yours and you had it. LOL But instead, it's just numbers on a piece of paper right now. We can't touch it until years from now so I'm sure that we will be OK. What's tougher was the discussion that Pastor had with the staff this week. All discretionary spending is done at church right now. The next step if we find giving dropping off is that all staff will get a 10% cut in pay. That's gonna hurt us a bit. But I know we'll do OK. My oldest is now doing her work study AND working at the local grocery store so and the second daughter (16) is waiting to hear back about her job there too. So with both girls gainfully employed, they can now cover their own clothing, extras and parties rather than us having to pay for all of that. I'll still give them things here and there but it will be a huge burden to not have to clothe the two of them! LOL God will get us through. Even if we have to sell the house and move to a less expensive house, that's OK. We're willing to sell off the boat (which is completely paid for and we don't pay anything on it since it's my IL's Christmas gift to us each year - to pay for the boat expenses), and whatever else we need to in order to make it. But I have faith that God will provide what we need - and maybe a little of what we want too. We've been through tough times before and we'll do it again.

Then there's the season. It's fall here on Long Island and we just took down our large awning outside and started winterizing things. I'm cleaning out the basement so I can start hanging the clothes down there when we start up the furnace. It's a tiny basement with a big furnace so it runs around 85 degrees down there all winter long. Hanging a load of clothes means it's dry in 6-8 hours down there! Why not utilize the heat we have and dry clothes without the dryer??!! :) I'm going to shop around this week for firewood since we're low and I'm thinking it's going to be a tough winter (horses have their winter coats a full 2 months early this year and we've not seen that in about 12 years) and fires are wonderful when it's cold out. The place where we got fire wood last year is now running $239 a cord plus delivery and that's just sick. I'm not paying that kind of money for wood! So I need to check around and see what else I can find instead. But I think with everything else, we're set. Oh wait! I just realized I should check the kids' boot situation. Hmmm....

So it should prove to be an interesting fall/winter.

Menu Plan Monday

This week's plan:

Monday - Burgers on the grill, corn, potato salad
Tuesday - Beef Burgundy, wide egg noodles, salad (new recipe)
Wednesday - Cranberry, Pear and Chicken Salad, popovers
Thursday - Poulet D'Artichoke, rice, broccoli (trying new recipe that I saved from 2001)
Friday - Leftovers (have homeschool group til 4:30 and then small group at 7:30)
Saturday - Caramel Apple Pork Chops, steamed carrots, roasted potatoes (yet another new recipe!)
Sunday - Taco Soup in the crockpot, salad




OK - To give you an idea how my plans changed this past week, here's my last week's plan and the actual meals we ate:

Sunday - we ended up doing take-out - salad and burgers. YUM!
Monday - Wine-braised Italian Sausages and salad
Tuesday - Oven roasted pork tenderloin with herb sauce and roasted veggies
Wednesday - We'll be eating at the ILs
Thursday - Tacos, salad
Friday - Leftovers or Ravioli along with broccoli ended up eating out
Saturday - Cranberry Chicken Salad, bread was given sauce and meatballs on Friday so used that instead with spaghetti and salad
Sunday - Roast Chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, gravy had Chinese instead

"Jesus" music - I'm so glad it's changed...

I just hope this doesn't get stuck in your mind like it has mine...

The Blessing of "Stepping In"

On Friday, we had our homeschool group and I was just kind of walking around talking to some of the moms and helping with any of the issues that come up on our first day. There was a wedding that was going to happen Saturday that one of our men was going to do some cooking for so he was in the kitchen preparing to make sauce for pasta and meatballs. I walked in to say "Hi" to him and he was trying to peel a ton of garlic but didn't know the "trick" of smacking it with the side of a knife to make it easy to peel. So I washed up, took a head of garlic and helped him to peel all of it and it only took a few minutes (would have taken him MUCH longer at the rate he was going not to mention now there were 2 working on it and not just one). We had a nice visit while doing this and I also helped him to cut up the herbs he was using and open the cans of tomatoes (4 cases of canned tomatoes!). Then I was called away so that's all I was able to help with.

When I came back later that evening, he had everything done and was cleaning up so while waiting for my daughter, I helped with that too. It was just natural to step in rather than standing and watching him do it all and I'd hope that if it were me, someone would help me too. Well, he told me he had something for me - a huge tray of meatballs and sauce! It was huge! I took it home, gave some to my dad for HIS dinner and we had a hearty spaghetti and meatball dinner last night - thanks to Mr. Kelly.

We shouldn't expect rewards when we help others - and I certainly was not expecting anything on Friday. I was doing it because I like it, I wanted to help and it gave he and I some time to chat. But the extra blessing of dinner was wonderful! But may I always be willing to step in where needed - not for the reward - but for the fact that there is a job that needs to be done and I was available to do it. May I always be be sensitive to where something needs to be done and not be so busy that I can't do it.

Recipe Challenge

OK - I'm straightening up my "pile" in the kitchen (come on, admit it, you have one too) and I'm finding a bunch of recipes I've pulled out of magazines - or even the whole magazine with recipes marked! So I took the recipes and put them in my "to try" pile which is now getting to be a whole shelf in my cabinet. Uh-oh!! I think it's time to try some of these out.

So my challenge to myself and everyone here is to try a new recipe over the next week and atleast 3 over the month of October. I'd love for you to tell me the recipe then try it - and report back as to whether if it were good or not. If it's good, we must have the recipe too. :)

So, I'm going to try a beef burgundy from the Ladies Home Journal Family Favorites Cookbook (one of those little thin cookbooks they stuff in the plastic sleeve they ship the magazine in). It looks simple, hearty and oh, so yummy for fall! I'll let you know how it goes.

My Letter to Sandi

Sandi's note to Candy:

I am depressed, but I am saved also. My trouble is my DH is saved but does not do what i s required from a husband. For 10 years he has been talking about doing everything for the lord, but his actions do not correlate with his words. The man is supposed to be the leader AND provider of his family. Yet, his job situation does not provide adequately for my family of six. The bills barely get paid, and my growing children are often hungry. We can't afford doctor or dental visits so I have to try to diagnose the children myself and make homemade cures if they are afflicted with something. I pray to be relieved of financial stress...to have the ability to feed,cloth,buy shoes,and take care of them medically without feeling I am "splurging" to cover their basic needs. Ten years is a LONG time to wait for my husband to provide this. He is talented in many areas and could get a steady job that would ease our money issues, but I am beginning to wonder if he is just too selfish. So, while sit and I pray for deliverance from my husband's apathetic interpretations of his christian duties I am making a sparse lunch for my 4 children as he is eating out at Taco Bell. Depressed? YES!
Sandi



Dear Sandi -

I am so sorry that you are struggling right now and I can hear your frustration in your note. It is so difficult when circumstances seem so difficult and we are at the end of our ropes to figure out how to get out of the hole we're in. But there is one thing I want to let you know that may be of help to you. You cannot change your husband. Whether he's the most amazing man or the poorest of wretches, there is nothing YOU can do to make him a better husband, father or man of God. Not one Scripture tells us to do anything to make another person better - all we can do is deal with ourselves and our own hearts in the matter. So here's my advice to you:

1) Pray. There are a number of issues to pray for that I see in your note. One is that God would speak to your own heart and help you to find joy in all of your circumstances. Read Philippians 4:11-13 which reads "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. " Remember that Paul had gone though some extreme life circumstances yet still chose to be content. It's a hard thing when we are pressed on all sides but when you find your joy in the Lord through whatever may come, I think you will find that your responses to the hardship will be very different. In addition, you are teaching your children the same lesson because they learn from example before they can ever learn from words.

Secondly pray for your husband. I do not know your husband and all I can get from your note is one side. I do not know the struggles he has or his heart in this matter but that's OK. God does. Pray for him for wisdom, for clarity, for a heart that is given over completely to the Lord. Pray that he would have other men in his life to feed into him who can sharpen him in his walk with the Lord. I know nothing of being a man or being the head of a home but I can safely say that it must be a very difficult position to be in. Not all men are wise in their leading but there's nothing we can do to change that - other than beseech their Creator. He can do great things when we step out of the way and allow Him free access to our husbands.

Lastly, pray for your circumstances. Pray that God would allow you to be able to provide for your family with the resources you have. Pray that God would bless your work as a wife and would multiply your food and your resources like He mulitiplied the oil of the widow to be able to feed your family and to keep them healthy.

2) Spend time in the Word. Make sure that YOU are seeking the Lord in all that you do and that you are seeking His voice each day. My recommendation to you would be to read Philippians for the entire month of October - it's an amazing book of Scripture that deals with much of what you're going through. Meditate on God's Word. Memorize portions of Scripture so that you can hide it in your heart and play those words over and over again rather than the words in your head saying "If only...."

3) Take your focus off of your husband and your circumstances and keep them on the Lord. Don't look at others thinking "Well they have ..." or comparing yourself to others. I know it's hard but when you do this, you are looking at worldly measures and not the absolute measures of God. Prosperity and success are not in this world - nor is our comfort.

4) Practical stuff:

a) Sit down and figure out the budget with your DH if he's willing. See what you absolutely have to spend and stay within the budget. Of course this is depending on your husband and if he chooses not to do this, you need to abide by that. But understand your finances and work within them.

b) Learn skills to save money on your groceries, clothing and medical. I'm sure you're already doing this but step it up a notch if you need to. I don't know if you've got $20 to spend on groceries a week or $200 but learn how to save as best you can. Yeah, you might have very little and maybe not even enough to spend on food for your family. I know women who literally haven't had a penny to spend on food. Look to help from your church and other local churches in the area and, if necessary, look to something like foodstamps for a time. I'm not one to be big on government hand-outs but they're there for a reason and we've paid into them. If you absolutely have nothing on your table for your family, then look into it. Just a warning though. If you do get the government involved, they will make you get a job outside the home and that may not be what you or your husband wants you to do. So the foodstamps is an absolute last resort, IMO.
For clothing, befriend people and ask them for hand-me-downs. "Oh I love what Johnny wears - he always looks so nice. If you ever have any clothes that he's outgrown, I'd be more than happy to give them a new home." is not a terrible thing to do (I've done it myself). If you can afford it, shop cheap. If you can't afford anything, you'll need to do your best to find very inexpensive or free clothing. Garage sales and the Salvation Army are good places to find inexpensive clothes. I've also heard of many women being happy to ship a box of clothes to someone they know online when the request comes in on a board or though a blog. Sometimes we need to get creative.
Look into possible state insurance. I know New York State has something called Child Health Plus and it's an insurance through the state that provides insurance to the uninsured. It is VERY cost effective and covers not only medical but vision and dental. It's very generous in it's guidelines so that it's free to many people and even when there IS a portion that you have to pay, it's VERY little (like $5-50 a month) with a per-family cap. See if your state has anything like that.

I do pray for you, dear sister Sandi. You are at a place of pain right now but part of that pain is your own heart view of your circumstances. Seek the Lord - call on Him while He is near. Do not let your heart be troubled. The Lord your God is with you wherever you go. He is faithful and will supply all your needs - your true needs in this life. If you do happen to read this, I would really love for you to get a hold of me. I'd love to be able to speak to you and pray for you knowing a bit more of who you are. But if not, God knows you and can still answer my prayers. We serve an awesome God.

Love, your sister in Christ,
Ann